Two real estate agents decided to start a new career to sell shoes. The two real estate agents goes to Africa to open up new markets. Three days after arriving, one real estate agent said, "I’m returning on the next flight. Can’t sell shoes here. Everybody goes barefoot." At the same time the other real estate agent sent an email to the factory, telling "The prospects are unlimited. Nobody wears shoes here!"
A real-estate agent, had difficulty getting a listing from a customer whose theory was that "there is no substitute for experience." After he asked her a third time how many years she had been in the business, she told him: "Sir, there is a little-known historical fact that Moses brought three tablets down from the mountain-two were the Ten Commandments and the other was my real-estate license!" She got the listing.
A FEW QUIPS AND QUIRKS:
The dream of the older generation was to pay off a mortgage. The dream of today's young families is to get one.
I listed a maintenance free house. In the last 25 years there hasn't been any maintenance.
Did you hear about Robin Hood's house? It has a little John.
If you want to know exactly where the property line is, just watch the neighbor cut the grass.
Trivia: The floors of buildings are called stories because early European builders used to paint picture stories on the sides of their houses. Each floor had a different story.
This country is great. It's the only place where you can borrow money for a downpayment, get a 1st and 2nd mortgage and call yourself a homeowner.
A man's home is his castle. That's how it seems when he pays taxes on it.
House problem: The oven is self-cleaning, but the kids aren't.
Houses today don't have enough closet space. Sure they do. They're just called guest bedrooms.
